BREAST CANCER AWARENESS: Supporting Your Loved One Through Diagnosis or Treatment (Blog #57)

This year marks the 40^th Anniversary of Breast Cancer Awareness Month!  What began as a week-long campaign to educate women about screening and routine mammograms has grown into a nationwide movement that continues to bring awareness to this disease.

Awareness is very important.  According to the Centers for Disease Control, breast cancer is the second most common cancer among all women in the United States (skin cancer is the first most common cancer for women), and the second leading cause of cancer death among women (lung cancer is the leading cause of cancer death).  For Black and Hispanic women, breast cancer is the leading cause of cancer death (CDC: Breast Cancer Statistics).  In fact, Black women are more likely to be diagnosed with breast cancer at a young age compared to White women (Black Women: Know Your Breast Cancer Risk). 

One in eight women will be diagnosed with breast cancer in her lifetime.  In 2025, an estimated 316,950 women and 2,800 men will be diagnosed with invasive breast cancer. Invasive cancer is cancer that starts in the breast ducts or glands, then grows into the breast tissue and spreads into the nearby lymph nodes and beyond.  Another 59,080 new cases of non-invasive breast cancer will be diagnosed.  See National Breast Cancer Foundation: Breast Cancer Facts & Stats 2025.  Given these numbers, there is a great chance that you know someone who has been touched by this disease. 

If you know someone diagnosed with breast cancer, or going through treatment, you may be wondering how you can support them.

Here are some great tips from SurvivingBreastCancer.org on providing emotional and practical support, and respecting boundaries, for a person going through a breast cancer diagnosis and treatment: 

EMOTIONAL SUPPORT

• Practice active listening: this means being present and attentive when your loved wants to talk.  Let them share their feelings without judgment or interruption. Focus on listening to understand, rather than to respond.

• Provide empathy and validation: this means accepting their emotions, fears and concerns.  You can show empathy by acknowledging their feelings and offering reassurance.

• Offer encouragement: provide words of encouragement and support. Simple phrases like “I’m here for you” or “You’re not alone in this” can have significant impact.

• Respect their coping mechanisms: everyone copes with situations differently, so respect the coping approach of your loved one.  They may prefer to be left alone or may want company.  Respect their preference in the moment.

• Avoid “toxic positivity”: "Toxic positivity" is believing that a person should keep a positive mindset no matter how dire or difficulty a situation is. This approach is frowned upon because it can show rejection of difficult emotions and invalidate some normal fears. This also minimizes a person’s real experience and could lead to feelings of shame. 

  
  

PRACTICAL SUPPORT

Some people may not want to ask for help, but you can give support by offering to take on tasks you know can be done by others, such as:

• Help with daily chores: offer to assist with household chores, grocery shopping, meal preparation, or childcare. 

• Accompany them to appointments: go with them to medical appointments or treatment sessions if they want company or need assistance. Consider creating a shared calendar to keep track of appointments. 

• Help with financial tasks: offer to help organize bills or seek financial aid resources to alleviate their financial burden during treatment.

• Help them with research and information:  help gather information on treatment options, support groups, or helpful resources that might benefit them.

• Offer to receive access to their medical information: if you are helping your loved one from a distance, you may not be able to attend every appointment, and important information can get lost in translation. If your loved one is comfortable with it, allowing you access to their medical information can help with better communication between you and their doctors. 

RESPECTING BOUNDARIES AND PRIVACY

Respecting boundaries is very important when supporting a person experiencing breast cancer.  Remember that although they are becoming more dependent on you, they may also want to maintain some normalcy.  Here are some ways to help with this:

• Respect their privacy: be understanding if they choose not to discuss certain details about their diagnosis or treatment.

• Ask before offering advice: always ask before giving advice or suggestions. Sometimes they might just need someone to listen to rather than offer solutions.

• Be mindful of physical contact: respect physical boundaries. Some individuals may feel uncomfortable with physical affection or hugs.

These are a few suggestions to support your loved one who is going through a breast cancer diagnosis or treatment.  Ultimately, it will be love, compassion, faith and patience that will help you both through this challenging time.